Wonder in your Arms
by Alexis1985
Summary: A little Shunsui-Nanao I wrote after checking for new fics: we should write more!Bleach is not mine...sigh
1. Chapter 1

She is as little and precious as an infant can be

She is as little and precious as an infant can be.

She is not fat and pink, but her eyes are like the sea and you just can't look away from the different waves that dance in her unfocused gaze.

You touch her head, softly and with the utmost care, because She has no hair to speak of and you don't want to blemish her perfect skin with your rough hands.

She is stretching her hands at nothing, and you can't help to feel terrified:She may be blind. And then you remember that, technically, She _will_ be blind for another week and, really, you've seen oll kind of things…shouldn't you know better?

But here, in your hands lies an universe of possibilities and the thought is chilling.

She is fussy and loud, but sometimes, when She is smiling like that ( even if you _know_ she can't, actually) you remember that there was a mother involved in the making process and you thank Kami for that every day: She wouldn't be as cute if She had your face…or your stubble.

She is quieting now, and if you're lucky She'll be asleep in a matter of minutes.

The wind is her lullaby and your arms her cradle and you think that before She came, the world was a pitying place indeed.

Nanao is calling you, even now from her resting bed, to bossy you into doing some work and to ' please return my daughter to me, will you?'.

You'll comply, sooner or later, but for now you're content to stay here, with _your_ daughter, looking at the sakura blossoms falling around you…and next thing you'll know, She'll be old enough to take naps around Seritei with you…you can't wait.


	2. Chapter 2

Seasons

It's summer again and the heat has turned you into a living melting ice cream. It has been two years since you chased away your last fukutaicho and Yama-jii has grown weary of your usual antics. He should be a bit more sympathetic but then again he's surely lost more friends and comrades in his last 3 or 4 thousand years then you'll ever know in your own life.

Lisa has been gone for 1829 days and you're still counting…not that it will do you any good.

Sadly, many officers have found better captains to fight for and all you've been left with is a bunch of lazy drunks. Much as yourself these days.

A cloud takes a few moments of your time in the sun and you've got a brief respite from the still too hot weather. The strange thing is that there is no wind to speak of and the air is oppressive as a heavy curtain of black velvet. Where could this cloud have come from? Minutes after minutes go by and when you finally open your eyes you discover there is just the sun in front of you and a smallish figure in between.

Your sight is not completely right and everything seems surrounded by spots of the deepest black. But when your eyes decide to finally adjust, you can see a girl, barely out of childhood and standing still almost like a porcelain doll.

And she is as beautiful as one. Her skin is white and flawless, her hair dark and finely composed. Her dress seems without wrinkles and her mouth a decisive line across her face. Only her eyes are hidden to your gaze but you sit and then you see: they're like the sky when the sun last touches it. Indigo.

Nanao.

Your little Nanao-chan.

Not so little anymore (you remember to yourself she is almost fifteen even if she seems twelve)

She is still standing waiting for you to give her leave to speak.

You nod and she finally opens her mouth

"Taicho, Ise Nanao at rapport. I've been assigned as Fukutaicho of eight division…"

The wind suddenly starts up just next to you and a powerful blast of fresh air caress your skin. It's a completely foreign sensation and your senses are coming awake the more you listen to her.

She has stopped, now, but this great sensation of feeling all of your limbs, all of your hairs and nails and _everything_ that's _you_ has not and while you know you love summer and the heat, the sweat and the stillness of it, you think you're starting to appreciate autumn too: its sparkling weather, the beautiful warm tones of the leaves and the earth and this new air that has finally come your way.

She is autumn, cold but not quite cold, and as unobtrusive as the tittering rain.

She is your Nanao-chan, growth but not too much and still as proper as you remember.

She is your new Fukutaicho (and your last you vow to yourself).

She is just that one good intake of air you needed to start breathing again.

For the first time in a long time, you're grateful again.


	3. Chapter 3

Things have been progressing well so far: Nanao is finally home and your little girl is not so little anymore. Her hair have appeared at last and it seems she'll take after you in this aspect. Her skin is now milk white and her eyes as stunning as ever.

She is going to be trouble when she grows up.

Come to think of it, she already is.

It seems as if every Shinigami in Seritei is reduced to a bubbling fool as soon as he or she sets eye upon your daughter.

It all started with Yama-jii, that after seeing Sagiso for the first time, proceeded to brush his long beard on her bald head to make her giggle. And how could you forget Zaraki, who started dancing in the middle of 4° division just to jingle his bells? (Nanao has been wary of him after that). Rangiku thought it would be funny to present you with an enormous bra…never mind the fact your daughter is way too young for such things. Byakuga decided the best way to divert the child was to use his zampaktou and create a shower of sakura blossoms for her…it was a nice thing…up until the moment he thought himself well alone and started squealing like a suffering pig, using strange noises and snorting all the while: it was disturbing to say the least.

But the worst of all was Juushiro and Toushiro's visit. You're the first to admit your daughter will be a sure knockout when she grows up, but this will not be for 500 years (or so you hope) and there's no way in hell you'll even consider an arranged marriage between your girl and the short captain.

It has been a terrible month and yesterday morning you found a white hair (your first!) standing proud against the black. It's too soon for these things and yet Sagiso is already making you pay for every trouble you caused her mother…who, by the way, has been sniggering to herself like a madwoman for the last week or so.

Even now she is there, with your daughter in her arms suckling at her breast and you think you could face anything for the two of them

-Shunsui? Are you listening to me? I spoke to Unohana Taicho yesterday and it's confermed: I'm pregnant again…

Or not.


	4. Chapter 4

For those interested. The community 'Shunsui/Nanao: 101 years of love' proposes a challenge starting today. The rules are published on my profile and if you have any question, you can contact me or anyone of the staff. Since there will be three weeks to submit the fictions, you can participate with more then one but please, indicate what category you're participating in, ok? And now, on with the story.

Warning: there's reference to children abuse in this chapter, if you don't want to read, feel free to jump it entirely. While it's not what I had in mind when I started writing, my fingers went away form me and that's the result. I decided to post it regardless, since I think there's been something between Shunsui and Nanao far more troubling then Lisa's disappearance.

Haori

Takeda Ushigoro is your forth sat and you've know him for the last 400 years or so. He's one of the few officers still in your squad after Lisa disappearance. He's not a friend like Jyuushiro but you can consider him a fine drinking buddy and that's what count the most in this very troubling time.

Nanao-chan has risen up to the challenge you present for every fukutaicho sent your way, and even if you try to make it up to her with candies, books and teddy bears, the frosty glare she salute you with each morning is…a damn good way to make you feel guilty.

It's not that she's angry, just disappointed, like the patina protecting your very ugly self has finally came off her eyes and she can't deal with the result. It's not your fault (or that's what you keep telling yourself) but all the same you're much happier when night falls on your division and she returns to her apartment. She may be a fukutaicho, but she's still just a fifteen year old girl, and she needs 10 hours of uninterrupted sleep.

You gurgle down another cup of sake and Takeda is kind enough to refill it, again.

He's babbling about his most recent conquest, and you marvel he can attract anyone at all: you're Shinigami, and every Shinigami worth their salt is scarred, one way or another. But Takeda is much more then an ugly man with a scarred face. He's creeping, even by your standards and the poor man has found himself in the strangest situations with no fault whatsoever.

He's still going on about his lady's beauty, her black hair, her perfect nose, the soft lips…you cut him off in your head and start thinking about Nanao again.

Since she has been assigned fukutaicho, things have run smoothly and Yamaji stopped giving you headaches on the importance of paperwork and deadlines. Problem is, now it's Nanao that's chasing you around Seiritei with the same gusto a hungry dog chases a fat chicken and you don't like being the cornered one.

That's why you told her off.

In the most horrible way, you reminded her she's not your better and it's not like she could ever fill Lisa's shoes.

She remained where you left her and stopped speaking for two whole days.

She still chased you around and your guilt made you let her win.

It was a week later that the stares began and now that you think about it maybe the two events are not related. You wrack your brain trying to remember if you've offended her further in those seven days but nothing jumps at you. Nothing other then the fact that you bribed Takeda to be in your office every day for a couple of hours faking your signature.

Your friend is as drunk as he could possibly get and he sits still, staring at the wall with the most stupid grin on his face. He stopped talking a while ago and you have to ask

'Has anything happened with Nanao-chan a couple of months ago? She started giving me the evil eye…you didn't tell her you were faking my signature, did you?'

He looks at you, stupefied, and scratches his head while shaking it

'No Taicho…I would never do that'

You nod; it's not that after all

'…but weren't you listening to me? She's the one I was talking about! Why would she give you 'the evil eye'? She knows you approve…'

You freeze and your blood run cold and then hot in the space of a second and with clear understanding you suddenly know why she started glaring at you.

Takeda.

The creeping Takeda.

Who always find himself in a tight spot with no fault whatsoever.

And you've let him in the office with her.

Alone.

The sake you've consumed rushes to your mouth and for the first time ever you're sick to your stomach after drinking alcohol.

You run for the bathroom and the vomit blends with your sweat and your tears, but that's what you deserve after all.

You've failed, again.

And she did get to fill Lisa's shoes in the worst way: you've failed her.

You…you…

Bile rises again and the sounds of your retching are calling attention to yourself. That, you can't permit.

You have a job to do.

* * *

You're in the office when Nanao arrives, and a surprised look escapes her before she gives you the scratchiest glare you've ever received. You take it and bend your head in shame.

'I'm sorry. I didn't know.'

It's not enough, not even close, but she takes note of you now: your pink haori and your Capitan robes are nowhere to be seen and your hat is not on your head. You leave your desk and fall before her on your knees. The fashionable way you stile your bread is now gone and the haunted look in your eyes matches hers. She doesn't move but her lips tremble and a crease lines her forehead. She's thinner that you remember and disgust for yourself assault you once again.

She's looking at the floor now with her little fists clammed and shaking.

'He didn't…he…he…not completely…he...'

But you'll never know what he did or did not.

One of your officers finds the two of you in this strange pose: she, trembling and pale, you kneeling at her feet. You already know what he'll say, but you watch Nanao's face while news of Takeda's most gruesome death reach her ears.

And you're glad, fiercely glad you could do this for her.

A sort of misplaced pride fills your chest while a small smile turns up the corners of her lips.

Things will never be the same between you. She's not a child anymore and you're at fault for that.

You only hope she'll forgive you in time.

You know you won't.

* * *

The next day, you find a package on your steps. It's quite heavy and made of wood. You take it inside warily because you can't even start imagining who could send you something this expensive.

But when you open it, every doubt escapes your mind.

Hope swells unchecked and a warm feeling wash over you.

It's a pink haori.


End file.
